Shopaholics Anonymous Saves Friend from Brink of Shopping Turmoil

My friend mentioned last week that she’d taken herself off to Shopaholics Anonymous (SA) as needed a reality check on her shopping addiction.  It seemed appropriate (given the time of year) to ask if she would be happy to write about her experiences for my blog this week  – so here is my friend’s perspective on her first SA meeting.

Buffy the Credit Card Slayer ….

Like many of us I have a credit card.  In my case I’ve had it since I was eighteen and it has never been paid off in full (in fact it has even been taken off me at times). I am an emotional shopper – I buy to change the way I feel. I’ve bought items to change my life and barely used them (the guitar/writing desk for the novel/how-to books and a huge array of camping gear springs to mind). I have clothes still in bags, hidden in my wardrobe so my partner doesn’t see them. I have a vague idea of how much I owe, but can’t give you an exact figure (I don’t want to, either) and I avidly buy bargains while I am paying out huge amounts of interests to banks. I go overboard at the supermarket (because it is legitimate spending) and I give gifts that I really can’t afford to keep up appearances. I’ve never stuck to a budget and periods of frugality are usually followed by a huge splurge. Oh, and I buy shoes I can’t walk in and I can justify any purchase. Why I am not a trial lawyer, I will never know.

It's all my mother's fault

I was muddling along in denial when I had what 12-step groups call a rock bottom.

Now, rock bottoms are very personal and tend to relate to whatever you are struggling with. My friend stopped drinking after she made a pass at her boss at the Xmas party – for her that was horrifying. One friend hit rock bottom after her husband had his fourth affair. Another hit the wall when she couldn’t get into size 24 clothes any more. Basically, it is whatever hurts so bad that you say “Enough is enough; I don’t want to feel this way anymore.”

In a nut shell, I spent a morning with my mother (emotional trigger) headed straight for the shops and blew the money set aside for my partner’s wisdom teeth to be extracted. The shame & guilt I felt afterwards make me sick to my stomach.

I needed help so I went to the Spiritual Guru – i.e. Google. I looked up shopaholic anonymous…no…tried shopaholics….no…tried overspending anonymous…shopping disease? I finally tracked this down: http://www.12steps.co.nz/Debtors_Anonymous.php

The name was rather off-putting – was I a debtor? Well, according to my bank, yes I was.

Off I trotted to the meeting – and it was fantastic. I was welcomed by a friendly group of affluent-looking people (I had been expecting bag ladies) who talked about one day at a time, solvency, propensity and emotional shopping. If you desperately want to change how you relate to money and want tools to get yourself out of debt and start creating a future (instead of borrowing from it) – join this group.

Me? Well, it’s only been six days but I have cut up my credit card and am selling unneeded items on Trade Me.  I only carry cash and it is a set amount.  I’m leaving my Eftpos card at home – let’s face it, it deserves a holiday!

Watch me work my way back from debtor to investor, a dollar at a time.

Buffy the Credit Card Slayer

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About stylebyyellowtulip (234 Articles)
I fell into the art of style quite by accident. There was no defining moment when I decided that I knew what I wanted to do. I want people to feel good about themselves. Many don’t know where to shop and/or how to wear fashion. It has never been solely about cost, but of finding quality at a reasonable price and being able to wear - to suit your own figure, style and fashion. Join me as we explore – What is Style? Yellow Tulip

3 Comments on Shopaholics Anonymous Saves Friend from Brink of Shopping Turmoil

  1. Thank you so much for posting this – shopping is a positive force and can do so much good – it creates jobs, inspires creativity, and everything we buy started out as an idea – but for some of us it is out of control.

    Merry Christmas and wishing everyone properity!

  2. Thanks a lot for sharing this with all people you actually recognize what you are speaking approximately!

    Bookmarked. Please also consult with my site =). We could have a hyperlink change agreement between us

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  1. The First Post – The First Step « Buffy The Credit Card Slayer

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